unsaid
by McMuffin
Summary: Addison and Alex fic. Addex or Addisex whatever you call them. Deals with abuse in their childhoods, AU. One-shot... Fluff apart from the angst of the past, but no angst between the couple, they are happy.


**A/N: So um... Wrote this in about 30mins... Not too sure if I'm 100 happy with it, but whatever, here it is. Oh & it's mostly Addison's past-centric rather than Alex's... Enjoy! :)**

**Unsaid**

_Not that you're the one not to say I'm right.  
Not to say today and not to say a thing tonight.  
But suffice it to say we're leaving things unsaid.  
We sing ourselves to sleep watching the day lie down instead._

It had been six months. Addison and Alex, the couple who fought all the time, had been dating for six months. It was a miracle by the hospital's standards- most couples only lasted a few months, and the ones that lasted longer almost always ended up breaking up or at least being "dark and twisty". But not this couple, as much as they argued at work over cases and bad behaviour on Alex's part, the two of them were completely and madly in love.

If you saw them out of work you'd think they never fought and were the dream couple. They knew almost everything about each other, their favourite things, their bad habits, their secrets… Except their childhoods, they generally didn't talk about those a hell of a lot, probably because they both had had crappy childhoods.

They managed to avoid the topic of their growing up most of the time, and they each knew the other didn't like to talk about it. Fate too, knew they didn't like to talk about it, or even think about it, but it seemed fate had different plans for today.

Today when they rounded the corner to the main nurses' station there was a drunken man on the ground begging for pills, and not just any drunken man, Alex's father.

"Here, sir… We can help you-"

"Just listen to us-"

A few nurses and some interns tried to get him to calm down.

"No! You'll take me away! I just need drugs! For the pain!" Alex's father yelled and thrashed about, a few female nurses backed away.

Alex stood there in shock, and Addison looked between him and the man, noticing they looked similar and was trying to figure it out.

His father yelled out again,

"Please! I need the drugs! For my wife!" He said. That made Alex snap, he rushed forward, all the other doctors were confused.

"What the fuck are you doing here? Why are you fucking here?" Alex screamed at him, "You don't need the drugs for your wife, you're just a goddamn addict!" He yelled and looked like he was about to punch the man, Addison realized it was Alex's father and rushed forwards.

"Alex! Stop!" She said standing next to Alex and wrapping her arms around his waist so he couldn't do anything stupid.

His father laughed suddenly,

"That your girlfriend, son?" He slurred his words, "She's nice."

"You stay away from her. I don't want to see you again. Ever!" Alex yelled and broke out of Addison's grasp as he stormed off. She followed him, the rest of the hospital, still confused and now having to deal with the drunken father of an intern sitting on the hospital floor and muttering profanities at anyone who tried to talk to him.

.xXXXx.

Addison found Alex in a deserted hallway, sitting on a gurney and staring at the wall across from him.

"Alex…" She started to say before he cut her off.

"I don't want to talk Addison." He said sharply. She swallowed, he wasn't trying to hurt her by using that tone of voice, he was just upset.

"Alex…" She tried again.

"No. Addison. I don't want to talk. You can't help me. I'm too fucked up like my father." He glared at her.

"You are not fucked up, Alex." She said firmly.

"Yes I am! Hell I am so fucked up!" His voice grew louder.

"No. You're not." She said just a loudly.

"I am! I am just like him! I'm not going to be the perfect guy, I'm going to be a fucking asshole like him. I'm already an asshole."

"How could you possibly be like your father, Alex? You're COMPLETELY different to him!" She asked incredulously.

"Addison!" He huffed, "Did you not see how pissed off I got? How pissed off I still am? I got that from him! We both have rage issues! I'll turn out just like him!" He yelled.

She shook her head disbelievingly, he had never been like this before, and she didn't know how to convince him otherwise.

"Did you ever hit anyone? Did you ever hit me?!" She asked him, the only answer to that question being No.

"No! But I could…" He said.

Now she understood, he wasn't trying to compare himself to his father; he was worried he'd turn out like his father.

"No you couldn't!" She exclaimed. Her emerald eyes glaring into his brown ones.

"How would you know?" He asked clenching his fists, how could she possibly know what he was thinking?

Addison noticed his clenched fists and stepped closer to him, standing tall with her chin up. Almost like she was daring him to hit her. That was when he understood, his eyes softened and his fists unclenched,

"Addie…" He said softly, trying to see past the wall in her eyes.

"I should get back to work." Addison said stiffly as she turned around and walked away from him.

He stood there puzzled, so many conflicting emotions rushing through his body. She was right, there was no way he was like his father, but the way she had stood up to him was as if she knew what was coming, as if she expected what was coming, as if she was expecting to be hit. No one could have hit her before could they? Not…

Alex turned quickly and went to find someone.

.xXXXx.

"Dr. Shepherd!" Alex said as he walked past Dr. Derek Shepherd at the nurses' station, "Can I have a word?" He asked.

"Make it quick." Derek said walking after Alex expecting him to just ask him there but instead Alex dragged him but the arm into an empty room full of files.

"What the hell is going on Karev?!" Derek exclaimed.

"I want answers!" Alex yelled. Derek was confused.

"Why are you yelling so much today? First at your father, then at Addison-"

"Addison! Exactly!" Alex cut in.

"What?" Derek asked.

"Did you ever hit her?" He asked.

"What?!" Derek was shocked.

"Did you ever hit her?" He repeated with a clenched jaw.

"Wha- No! Never! Why would you think that…?" He was really confused now.

"You better not be lying to me Shepherd." Alex said.

"I don't think you should be speaking to me like that Dr. Karev." Derek said.

"Well if it's about my girlfriend, then yeah, I should." Alex said coolly. Derek blinked a couple of times to intake what Alex had said, he and Addison were dating… That was a shock; he obviously didn't listen to hospital gossip.

"What… What's about Addison?" He asked.

"I, Um…" Alex swallowed, suddenly feeling weird talking to her ex-husband about this, "Do you know if anyone ever hit her?"

"No…" Derek said, "Why?" He asked.

"Never mind…" Alex said turning to leave. This time it was Derek to grab him by the arm.

"No! If this is something about Addison then I want to know goddamnit! She was one of my best friends for over 15 years, and still is!" He said staring at Alex.

"Well… It's just, I think…" There was no need for him to go into details about his shitty childhood too, "I think she may have been abused at some time in her life… I just don't know when…" He looked straight at Derek, "What was her family like?"

"I've never met them but… Her mother hates her; her father hasn't seen her since she was 14… And her step-father was an alcoholic, but he would never." Derek said.

"Okay…" Alex nodded and walked off, feeling slightly shocked and numb.

His amazing girlfriend who was so perfect might just be hiding some secrets…

.xXXXx.

"Addie?" He asked as he opened the door to her office quietly.

"Alex?" Addison said wiping her eyes, hoping he wouldn't notice in the darkness.

"Where are you?" He asked again, not seeing her at her desk, even though the lights were off.

"On the floor." She said and he looked down and saw her sitting on the floor.

"What are you doing on the floor?" He asked her.

"Thinking…" She said vaguely.

He nodded and sat on the floor slightly behind and to the right of her.

"Was it your step father?" He asked breaking the silence. She waited before nodding slightly,

"Yeah…"

"Add…" He whispered, "What happened?" He asked her, she knew all about his past with his father, he wanted to know about hers so he could help her.

"He…" She sniffed, "My father left my mother for some younger woman when I was 14… Mom was left with nothing, but I got a trust fund for when I was 18. Being used to the rich life we had, mom married the first wealthy guy she could find… My step father…" She paused and glanced at Alex who was watching her intently.

"He… He used to get so drunk sometimes… And he would always lash out at me, never mom, just me, he never wanted me… But mom would always see him hitting me, and she never did anything about it…" A tear trickled down her cheek, "I tried to tell my best friend, she just laughed it off and said I was being a drama queen as usual, nobody believed me… by the time I was 17 it had become like a ritual, every Saturday he would get pissed and hit me, on Sunday the bruises would be sore but I'd cover them up for school on Monday… By Wednesday they'd be gone." She glanced at the floor.

"Want to know how I celebrated my 18th birthday?" She laughed a little,

"Did he…?" Alex's voice wavered and as she looked at him she saw his eyes were filled with worry.

"No… He never did that… On my 18th I ran away. I didn't have a party or any celebrations, I just made sure they couldn't access my trust fund or any of that, I packed up all my stuff and left… And I've never been back." She finished talking and looked over at him with a half smile, "Still think I'm so amazing huh? Taking 4 years of being hit?" She asked him with tears running down her face.

Alex moved to hold her in his arms,

"Addie…" He said softly, "Of course I think you're amazing… I love you…" He kissed the top of her forehead, "And I promise… You were right; I'm nothing like my father… Or your step-father, I'll never hurt you."

He rocked her back and forth on the floor as the tears spilt from her eyes, a few even slipped from his too, but he didn't care about her seeing them.

"I know…" She said softly, "I love you too…"

**Hope you liked it! :) Boy oh boy that blue button looks pretty... :P**


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